I am not fond Canadian family doctors at all. Because Canada wants to provide public health care for everyone and private health care for the (slightly) rich, the entire system is screwed up. As a result, regular family doctors perform very poorly as professionals. Here is a generic class of a doctor and a Canadian family doctor, in pseudo OOP language.

Not all doctors are like this, but some unfortunate ones I’ve met are.

Doctor

class Doctor {
    var degreeOfEducation; 
 
    function Doctor (determination) {
        if(determination == "strong") {
            degreeOfEducation = 1;
            startBusiness();
        } else {
            degreeOfEducation = 0;
            exit();
        }
    }
    
    private function startBusiness () {}
}

So far so good.

Canadian Family Doctor

class CanadianFamilyDoctor extends Doctor {
    var fund;
    var salary;
    
    function CanadianFamilyDoctor () {
        super();
        degreeOfEducation = 0;
    }
    
    function startBusiness () {
        fund = Government.borrowMoney(INFINITY);
        City.openBusiness(this, fund);
        while (1) {
            salary = Government.borrowMoney(9999999);
            Sleep("one year");
        }
    }
    
    function bookAppointment (dayOfWeek) {
        if ((dayOfWeek >= 1) && (dayOfWeek <= 7)) {
            if (isSummer) {
                this.onVacation();
            } else {
                this.currentlyFull();
            }
            return 0;
        } else if (dayOfWeek == null) {
            return (date() + rand() * 30 + 5);
        }
    }
    
    function appointment (symptom) (
        if ((symptom == "running nose")) {
            informPatient("You have a cold, here.");
            chickenScratch("Tylenol");
        } else {
            informPatient("Here.");
            chickenScratch("L$d7@doFD#");
        }
        
        if (symptom == complaint || symptom == nonstop) {
            referToSpecialist();
        }
        
        collectMoney();
    }
 
    function referToSpecialist () (
        printf("Phone number: %s-%s",
            floor(rand()*999),
            floor(rand()*9999));
    }
}

And if you noticed, srand() is nowhere found in the code.